YOU

Wow! been a while since i wrote something. i dont even remember when the last time was. i was just looking at my previous posts and realised that the last time i posted were during the mumbai terror attacks. been about 4-5 months ( i think ).

well, life is rolling on. its been a mixed 4 months. made a few new friends as well as lost a few. last week was a bit of a shit one. its funny how relationships change people. when a person is in a 'im single' perspective, its often so easy to talk about how he/she will be when committed with someone.

quite often, the words uttered remain just that - pure nonsensical words. i think life is a learning experience. when one applies learning, he is successful and when one doesnt, he fails. i sometimes fail to understand why people cry endlessly over failed relationships. they so often stop themselves from playing fully as well as living fully. i do agree that it is the loss of someone special in you life, but, at a very broader extent, it is also about YOU. its about what YOU want and about your dreams.

a lot of times in life, one can get carried away by circumstances. circumstances occur everywhere and at everytime. when in a relationship, life is usually like a river with no end. an endless horizon. but when the break up happens, we find ourselves with two legs in two different boats, and whats quite amusing sometimes is, us wanting both the boats.

the past week has been a week of numerous breakthroughs. quite frankly, these past 8 months have made me somewhat, stronger. it is sometimes nice to be a '3rd person' in someones relationship. you witness and you learn. i dont know for a fact if i will apply this learning in my future relationships, but what i DO KNOW is that i will not let a circumstance affect me. i am bound to change as a person, but i will be aware to the change. a lot of people say that ive become quite 'hard-hearted'. the funny thing is, i like who i am.

i think for the first time in my life, i am focusing on myself. which is why, probably, i do not have time for love. this doesnt meant that i am not open to it. but what i know for a fact is that if i do fall in love, my life remains the prime focus. it does not shift for anything or for anyone. i have dreams to achieve and damn it i will achieve them even if its the last thing i do before i die.